Trust me - it is possible
Betrayal. Loss. Tragedy. We face so many unpredictable factors that can disrupt our lives, and often we feel powerless to prevent them. When I encountered my first challenges in my teenage and adult life, I frequently felt trapped.
Every time I experienced a significant conflict with my peers at school, I felt devastated. I would retreat to my room, shedding tears for hours, consumed by a deep sense of despair. When I failed my university entrance exams, I sought solace in drinking. And when my father fell seriously ill, the pain I endured seemed never-ending. I was completely shattered, and it took years of therapy for me to find inner peace.
I remember that after my world had crumbled, I often questioned whether there was anything I could have done to prevent it. More often than not, the answer was "No." It became clear to me that despite our best efforts, we cannot foresee every possibility. We are often confronted with forces beyond our control - such as illnesses, natural disasters, and the consequences of others' actions.
In those moments of facing such challenges, I felt insignificant in the face of this chaotic world. I would wonder if perhaps the world did not need me, if my existence was merely a cruel joke. Each time, silence was my only response. Silence and the urge to escape. When my usual means of escape no longer sufficed, I found myself searching for a different answer.
I asked myself, if I was born into this world with a purpose, then what is that purpose? Instead of dwelling on regrets about things I cannot change or control, I made a conscious effort to focus on activities that brought me genuine joy. This included helping others, self-education, traveling, cultivating a healthy mindset, and engaging in creative writing.
Gradually, with the guidance of my support therapy group, I learned how to strike a balance in my life - letting go of things beyond my control and taking action to improve what I can. And yes, also I had to gain the wisdom to discern between the two.
What truly aided me in my journey towards healing from loss was shifting my perspective. When my beloved father passed away, releasing the pain felt like diminishing the value of our special bond. However, I came to realize that holding onto regrets was not the only way to honor that connection. We can also cherish the memory of our loved ones and embrace the lessons we learned from them.
To my dear readers, healing after experiencing hurt is a path that many of us will inevitably traverse. Whether you are grappling with heartbreak, betrayal, or any other form of pain, please understand that the healing process may be arduous but ultimately fulfilling.
Here are several tips that can help you to navigate this journey:
First and foremost, it's important to acknowledge that healing is possible.
While the pain may feel overwhelming and never-ending in the moment, time has a way of softening the edges of our wounds and allowing us to move forward. It's important to give yourself permission to feel the pain and grieve the loss, but also to remember that you are capable of healing and finding peace again.
One of the key components of healing after being hurt is self-care.
This can look different for everyone, but it often involves taking care of your physical, emotional, and mental well-being. This may include getting enough rest, eating well, exercising, seeking therapy or counseling, practicing mindfulness or meditation, and surrounding yourself with supportive and understanding people.
Another important aspect of healing is forgiveness.
This doesn't necessarily mean forgiving the person who hurt you, but rather releasing yourself from the burden of holding onto anger and resentment. Forgiveness is a powerful tool that can help you let go of negative emotions and move forward with a sense of peace and closure.
It's also important to remember that healing is not a linear process.
There may be setbacks and moments of doubt along the way, but that doesn't mean that you're not making progress. Healing is a journey with ups and downs, and it's important to be patient and kind to yourself as you navigate through it.
In addition to self-care and forgiveness, finding healthy ways to cope with your emotions can also be helpful in the healing process. This may include journaling, creative expression, spending time in nature, practicing gratitude, or engaging in activities that bring you joy and fulfillment.
Ultimately, healing after being hurt is possible. It may take time, effort, and courage, but with the right support and mindset, you can emerge from your pain stronger and more resilient than before.
Remember that you are not alone in your journey and that there is always hope for a brighter tomorrow. Trust in the process, be gentle with yourself, and believe in your ability to heal and thrive once again!
Sincerely yours,
          Lubov Leonova
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P.S. Did you know that one of the most effective healing tools is reading fiction books about the characters who faced the same problems as you?
Feel free to move to the "Books" page and pick your insightful read!
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